Police Barred From Getting Penis Enlargements

Forget about getting a job as a police officer in Indonesia’s Papua if you have had your penis enlarged. You won’t get it, according to local media reports citing the Papua police chief.

An applicant “will be asked whether or not his vital organ has been enlarged,” said Papua police chief Bekto Suprapto, quoted on local website Kompas.com.

“If he has, he will be considered unfit to join the police or the military.”

The ban was applied since the unnatural size causes “hindrance during training,” said police spokesman Zainuri Lubis in Jakarta, quoted by news portal Detik.com.

Desk-Bound Men Target Of New Wonder Underwear

Businessmen who vowed to hit the gym daily in 2010 but are yet to leave the desk are the target of a new, fast-growing line of high-tech underwear which boasts to trim the torso while also benefiting your health.

Just ask Gavin Jones, co-founder of Australia-based company Equmen which has pioneered “fitwear” for men who spend the week hunched over desks in high-stress jobs and weekends chasing their children.

Jones said compression wear was well researched and accepted among elite athletes as was shapewear for women that trims and smoothes those stubborn bulges, but when he stood in front of the mirror he had one question — what about me?

“I was just beginning to show the signs of wear and tear. I had a pretty active 20s and 30s and maintained a great social life and played sport but I was just starting to turn the corner into middle age,” Jones, 43, a former journalist, told Reuters.

While women have quickly snapped into the increasing lines of shapewear, trebling sales in the past decade according to the market research NPD Group, Jones realized men wanted more than a male girdle or “mirdle” to trim the beer gut if they were to upgrade from their boxers or cotton briefs with fancy waistband.

Sheriff Arpaio Makes Inmates Pedal To Watch TV

Maricopa County, Arizona Sheriff Joe Arpaio has started a program he calls “Pedal Vision,” in which inmates pedal stationary bikes to generate electricity for television sets.

The bikes are customized to turn on connected TV sets once inmates at Phoenix’s Tent City Jail pedal enough to generate 12 volts of electricity. An hour of pedaling equals an hour of television.

Arpaio said inmates only will be able to watch television if they choose to pedal.

He said he started the program with female inmates because they seemed more receptive.

Arpaio said the only exercise female inmates have been getting is speed-walking around the tent yard.

He said Pedal Vision gives them a reason to get moving and a way to burn calories.

Woman Gets 6 Months For Fake Breasts Heist

An Orange County, California woman’s new breasts cost her six months in jail.

Yvonne Jean Pampellonne was sentenced Monday in Westminster for using a fraudulent line of credit to obtain $12,000 in cosmetic surgery, including breast implants and liposuction.

The 30-year-old woman had pleaded guilty to burglary, grand theft and identity theft. She was sentenced to 180 days in jail and was placed on three years’ probation. Restitution was also ordered by the Westminster judge, but the amount wasn’t immediately clear.

Pampellonne used a line of credit established in another person’s name to get the September 2008 procedures at the Pacific Center for Plastic Surgery in Huntington Beach.

Man Detained Over Poisoned Dumplings

China has detained a man suspected of poisoning frozen dumplings that were exported to Japan two years ago, sickening 10 people and causing tension between China and Japan.

The suspect, Lu Yueting, 36, put a poisonous substance in the frozen dumplings when he worked at a food plant based in China’s Hebei province, state media reported quoting the Ministry of Public Security.

The poisoned dumplings, which sickened 10 people in Japan in 2008, caused a food safety scare and sparked tension between China and Japan with the latter saying someone had deliberately poisoning the potstickers with insecticide.

State media reported Lu acted out of revenge as he was dissatisfied with his pay and colleagues.

Lu has apparently confessed and police have found injectors he used to poison the dumplings and collected several witness accounts, the statement from the ministry said.

Joe Biden Sums Up Health Reform Perfectly

After a century of struggle, euphoric Democrats watching President Barack Obama sign historic health reform into law seemed to agree with the over zealous reaction of gaffe-prone Joe Biden.

“This is a big f(expletive) deal,” Vice President Biden said in an aside to his boss, in a remark meant for Obama’s ears only.

But he was clearly heard above a gale of applause on television microphones, just after paying a gushing tribute to Obama in a signing ceremony in the East Room of the White House, teeming with lawmakers, political aides and cameramen.

The expletive quickly became … a big deal, as cable news channels went into overdrive, and one Internet entrepreneur immediately printed the quote on a tee-shirt and hawked it online.

White House press secretary Robert Gibbs played down the latest gaffe by America’s infamously loose-lipped vice president.

“And yes, Mr Vice President, you’re right,” he wrote on his twitter feed.

Cat-Calling Men Give All Men A Bad Name

Men who harass women with cat calls and sexual comments are actually harming their whole gender, a study has found.

The research, by Stephenie Chaudoir and Diane Quinn of the University of Connecticut in the United States, looked into the feelings and reactions of women who saw and heard men making derogatory remarks to other women.

The researchers asked 114 undergraduate female students to watch a video and imagine themselves as bystanders to a situation where a man made either a sexist remark at another woman or simply greeted her.

The students were then asked to rate their levels of anxiety and depression as well as their anger and fear toward men and their desire to move against or away from men.

The study showed that in addition to feeling upset, women were more likely to take the sexist remark as an insult to their gender, and feel greater anger and motivation to take direct action toward men in general.

Last Supper Paintings Supersize The Food

Has even the Last Supper been supersized?

The food in famous paintings of the meal has grown by biblical proportions over the last millennium, researchers report in a medical journal.

Using a computer, they compared the size of the food to the size of the heads in 52 paintings of Jesus Christ and his disciples at their final meal before his death.

If art imitates life, we’re in trouble, the researchers conclude. The size of the main dish grew 69 percent; the size of the plate, 66 percent, and the bread, 23 percent, between the years 1000 and 2000.

Supersizing is considered a modern phenomenon, but “what we see recently may be just a more noticeable part of a very long trend,” said Brian Wansink, a food behavior scientist at Cornell University.

Feminists Slam Breast Cancer Campaign As Sexist

Polish feminists have objected to a hospital’s breast cancer prevention slogan which they say encourages workplace harassment, the Gazeta Wyborcza daily said on its website.

The slogan “I check the breasts of my workers on my own” was devised by a cancer hospital in the southern town of Opole and aimed at convincing employers to encourage their female workers to have their breasts checked regularly for cancer symptoms.

“This is a sexist slogan that obviously brings sexual molestation to mind,” the head of the Feminoteka foundation, Joanna Piotrowska, was quoted on the website as saying.

“This campaign treats women as objects and is not far removed from advertisements in which girls flaunt their breasts over car bonnets. I wonder if this would be equally funny if it were changed to ‘I check the penises of my workers on my own’.”

Irish Pubs Face Hard Times

Ireland’s famous pubs and pints are reeling from their worst year yet, a report found — and the really bad news is it does not guarantee an end to drink-related social and health problems.

Against the backdrop of deep recession and unemployment, Ireland’s per capital alcohol consumption fell by 9.6 percent in 2009 and is now 21 percent below an all-time peak in 2001 when Ireland’s economy was booming.

“It was the worst year for our industry in living memory,” Kieran Tobin, chairman of the Drinks Industry Group of Ireland (DIGI), told a news conference in a central Dublin pub.

Pubs have been closing at the rate of around one a day, he said, and 15,000 jobs had been lost across the sector over the last 18 months.

Last year’s drinking decline follows a 7.7 percent decline in per capital consumption in 2008, while in volume terms consumption declined 8.9 percent in 2009 after a 5.9 percent drop in 2008, the report by Anthony Foley of Dublin City University Business School for DIGI, which represents the on-trade — pubs, hotels, restaurants — and off-license sector.